Venting the Pain

At 10PM, after running a mile & working my ass off at CrossFit, my entire leg feels like dead weight, the pain killers aren't helping, my head is cluttered with frustration, & I'm so tired that I'm awake. I just want to cry. Forgive me for venting but what's the point of this thing if I can't be real from time to time. I feel like this is the worst thing ever. Like all my hard work and building up that tiny bit of strength & endurance is just going down the drain. How am I supposed to do lifts, wallballs, slam balls, burpees, or ANYTHING else we do there if I can't even do a full squat??? I've been doing a full squat anyway... Pretending it doesn't hurt, trying to do them fast so the pain doesn't last as long but I come home every. single. night. and lay in pain. Icing my knee down three times a day. How long can I keep this up? Every time I go to CrossFit I wonder how many days I have left before I collapse and have a serious knee injury. 

It's venting like this though that make me thankful for all the things I do have. It puts me in perspective. I need to work through this injury by doing the rights things. I need to do it with the same belief and drive that I have the rest of this journey. 

Today is not the day that my journey will come to an end.

Today was rough, but I thought I did well. & I was able to put my pride aside & do less on my back squat to save my knee. 

For the WOD we did a 400m run & then 3 rounds of 30 wall balls & 5 power cleans. I finished & didn't think it was that bad.... which makes me know I should have worked harder!

As always I appreciate the support. I haven't told yall that in awhile and I know I haven't been messaging back & keeping up with yalls progress as much as I'd like to, but I hope you are all still working hard & are inspired to be the best version of you (: Much love.